There was a lot of strange thinking in the older generations. In my family, they pretty much did not start going to the doctor until they started falling apart. They did not do any preventive healthcare. I do my annual checkups and follow up appointments and treatments. I also believe in mental healthcare. This also applies for all the people and animals in my home.
We also have a much more even marriage when it comes to household tasks and making meals. My mom was in charge of all of that plus having a full time job plus helping my dad and his business. In addition to that, we both have our own interest and hobbies as well as shared hobbies. There are activities we can do on our own and with each other. It is a much more fulfilling relationship than the households in my family.
My mother was always adamant about not having people over at our house and limiting how much we could hang out with friends outside of school growing up. With my kids I was much more flexible with that. They went to friends for play dates and parties. They also did lots of extracurricular school and non-school activities to spend time with friends and other kids outside the home. I gave them ample opportunities to try and find their people and have varied social groups.
I also prioritize experiences over stuff for gifts. For holidays and birthdays, we typically went to new places and events to expand our horizons. Lots of varied things: plays, ballets, concerts, museums, parks, hikes, traveling, as well as many types of activities. We went rock hounding, painting, hieroglyph searching, and so many more things. In my upbringing we never had the time or funds to go places or do things and I was able to give that to my kids as well as experience it in my relationship.
It is funny how your upbringing creates different priorities for the next generation. My parents and I have a lot of similar morals and virtues, but how we interpret them is different.
Mother of Trauma 
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