“Forget your worry and self doubt, write your stories now.”
Pushing myself to begin writing earlier I think would have brought me a lot more satisfaction with my life. I am meeting people, improving, and learning more about the whole world of writing everyday. If I had started sooner, I could have had a back catalog before the pandemic. Perhaps I could have been one of those breakout writers. Or perhaps I could have met and kept a lot more friends that were into this weird world I have found myself in.
I am slowly moving in all these new avenues, but by now I could have had over a decade of writing below my belt. I started writing again in November. It has improved so much since then. I wonder how good of a writer I would be by now.
Writing is probably the thing I question most about myself. I thought about it for years, but hesitated. Due to lack of self confidence and self esteem, I never started writing again. I worked out some dreams of things I wanted to write, but I never really pushed myself to actually do it. I would never get through the first few pages.
I am always so sad to realize how my own fears keep my options limited. I wonder how few fears I would have left if I had gotten started back then when I was so broken.
The writing is going well now. I have become prolific. I am building a group of fans that encourage me to continue. I have sold a few books. Things are moving. I cannot change the past, but I will always wonder. For now, I keep writing and see where it takes me.
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