Anniversary

Celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary over the weekend at the restaurant we had our first date. I am so happy that they are still in business! Best food I have ever had.

It was a bit somber this year what with the children out of the house and the very rocky last two years. I honestly thought we would have divorced at several points. We have made it through. Trying to reconnect and have time to be a couple again instead of parents.

We had a nice weekend. Did some yard work, took care of the animals, and talked about what we would like to get done during the rest of the year. We have a lot of plans we would still like to get done together. Places we want to visit. Improvements we want to make. Personal projects we would like to complete.

Now that I have been writing. I feel more like my own person again. I am no longer only Mom. I have a network of people that I communicate with about shared passions. I feel myself branching out more and becoming more willing to take risks again.

Life keeps on moving whether you want it to or not. My partner is working through some stuff and trying to better himself and become more responsible for himself, which should leave me with more space in my brain for me stuff.

We have a few more hard things to deal with, like his mother’s declining memory and my father continuing failing health. I feel like we are in a place where we are better equipped to deal with that now.

My physical health has increased tremendously the last few months, so that has helped my resolve and allowed me to put more onto my own plate. My body may still be working against me, but at least it is reliable in that way. I know when it is going to have issues and how long it will need to recover.

I wish I did not feel like the world was falling apart around us. I would feel so much more optimistic about the future for us. The state of the world has definitely been an extra strain on our relationship.

I am hopeful that the two of us are going to make it through all of this together. A year ago I would not have said that. This year it feels more safe, more secure. Communication has become so much more open and I feel like he finally hears me.