What’s the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?

“Don’t worry about what everyone else is doing”

Of course this is a piece of advice that took me a long time to accept, as I think it does for most people. Especially since the invention of social media. It is so much easier to compare yourself with others at the same time it is easy to hide the struggles behind the scenes.

We have been going through this with our kids. They are constantly comparing themselves to other people. Our oldest compares herself to people of the past who started families out of high school. That is not a typical thing people do these days. My youngest is currently freaking out about graduating and having the rest of her life planned out. Also something that most people do not do at her age.

There is so much pressure to know where you are going and how to get there. An emphasis on having every moment of your life planned out. Then when those plans fail, people spiral. Reality is fluid. You could change careers, jobs, partners, friends, homes, at any time. Your future is only set by what you allow yourself.

Some people are going to go full steam ahead. Others are going to take in the view before moving on. All of these approaches are valid. We are all different people with different skills, goals, personalities, and dreams. Being paralyzed by by indecision is a normal thing when you transition to adulthood. We need to quit pressuring everyone to know what they want for the rest of their life.

Focus on the next year or two. Decide what you want to do right now and work toward that goal. Once you get there, you can decide the next step. There really is no point in mapping out the rest of your future. Things change. You will be more prepared for the future if you are more adaptable and less focused on one outcome.

Ignore what everyone else is doing and do what is right for you right now.