Most days all you have time to focus on are the big things: the meltdowns, the name calling, the forgotten update, the failing grades or food refusal. You begin to feel like nothing is improving. That this hell is never ending. You wonder if you are going crazy because raising kids should not be this hard or the human race would never have survived this long.
Then in a moment of calm, you are able to reflect on the current problems and the past issues. You see that change has happened. Even if it is small, microscopic or infinitesimal. The kids were able to ride together in the back seat of the car for 90 minutes. There was no arguing, no name calling, no triggering, no screaming and no crying. I did not notice it at the time. It was also overshadowed on the way back, they whined, fought and had a burping competition. My therapist pointed it out to me.
We had driven to visit and bottle feed baby sheep. They were adorable. They wore little knit sweaters. There were babies from one day old to five weeks old in the barn. The whole family enjoyed this experience. I have tons of adorable photos.
For 90 minutes in the car and 60 minutes with the sheep, life was perfect. There were no problems that needed to be solved. There was nothing, but laughs and smiles. It was lovely and I need to remember that.
Mother of Trauma 
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