Catharsis: purgation of the emotions, primarily through the act of art

I have always found that writing out my thoughts can be very calming. Once it is on paper, it is no longer replaying in my brain. I am free to think other thoughts, even ones of my own choosing. When you are a parent, everyone tells you how important self-care is and they tell you to find whatever makes you feel better – that you need time to recharge. Sleep, eating, reading, pampering, you name it, I have tried it.

I always feel like I am just wasting time that could otherwise be spent fretting and aimlessly trying to prevent the next disaster. I never give myself time to actually do what I want to do. It makes me feel guilty. However, if I do not attempt at making myself feel better, I become a worse parent. I am more irritable. I am more quick to anger. I am impatient. I turn small bumps in the road into mountainous hikes. You need to take time to yourself. You need to do something, whatever it is, that makes you feel better.

It is cathartic for me to get my story out of my head. I need to share it. I need to learn from it. It helps me see the bigger picture, to see my mistakes from a fresh perspective. Therapy has been great, but it does not match the power of me sharing my story. I like hearing how others have also struggled. It reminds me that we are only human. We are going to screw up. We are going to feel bad about what we have done. We all wish we could change the past.

Today, I have started this project. I want to reach out to other people who are going through the pains of life and let them know they are not alone. Feel free to read and say nothing, comment, email, whatever you need. I will be here and I will be writing.